What do you really want?

So many things in life
So many choices
In the end, what do you really want?

You play a sad song just to turn it around
But in the end it still comes back
Like a never ending cycle

Why do you wake up everyday
Wondering what you're doing in life?
Why live a life with no purpose?

What are your goals?
You know them
But you're afraid of taking the first step
Where did that courage go?
Why can't you just take the plunge
And dive in?

You learn to think
To make choices
But no one can tell if your choices were good or bad until the time comes

Being brought up in a life where choices used to be made for you
You don't know how to stand on your own feet
You rely on people so much
You become a burden

When are you going to start living your life like your supposed to?
When are you going to be brave again?
When will you take the plunge?

When?
Why are you still not letting go and moving on?
Once bitten twice shy

You try to convince yourself
"There are many people to be loved, so why limit yourself to just one?"

Why are you still afraid?
What are you afraid of?
=)

E.T.

Do you really miss him?

If you look at yourself now
You realize
That you don't really miss the person
Well not fully, maybe...

What you really missed was the affection
The attention
The care
The hugs
The time
The talks

Most of all
The feeling of being wanted

You try to look for those in other people
But sadly, they can't provide you the same
The feelings aren't the same anymore

You're just afraid of letting another soul in
What happened to the courage to conquer?
What have become of I?
Where has the heart gone to?

4 years of the relationship doesn't just disappear from memory overnight
Habits don't just die in 1 day
We still share a lot of things in common, maybe, maybe not

On some days, we could talk like best friends again
But on usual days, I would avoid the other
Coz' it hurts to be reminded of the past
It really hurts so much
That you block out all your feelings and emotions
You don't really connect to people anymore

Overall: You're just plain weird.
Any other soul would agree 100% on this.

E.T.

Are we just friends?

Looking at where I am at the present
I kinda don't know what I want in life
What do I want to achieve in life?
Is just being happy enough?
Do I want more?

What do I want?

Honesty, I'm afraid
Afraid of letting go
Afraid of being hurt again

Who could tell what would happen in the future?
No one...
How would you know that a certain person would stay in your life forever?
No one can tell...
Not a single soul...

You spend time talking to people
But you're afraid if they wanted more of this relationship
You're afraid to commit
You're afraid to go through the same mistakes
You're afraid of failure....

You come out of your shell thinking
"Oh, we're just going to be friends"
"Nothing more"
But then, I guess it isn't the same for them
After all, not everyone is going to be nice to you
So.... Kill them with kindness?

Meow....

E.T.